What IS on the line

Dear youth football coach(es),

I am terribly sad to even have to write this letter. I mean, we are only four games into the season, and I truly had such high hopes. I know that you are a volunteer, and I have been appreciative of the fact that you have taken time out of your life to allow my boys to do something they very much enjoy. It makes me happy to see my kids doing what they love. But, in the last couple of weeks, your actions and/or words during games have caused me to be considerably less appreciative and have even made me wonder if this whole thing is worth it.

I get that football is exciting and emotional. We all want our teams to do well and to win the game. Just this afternoon, I was acting pretty crazy in my living room, waiting for my beloved Aggies to finally pull out the win. Honestly, the game could have gone either way. Would I have been disappointed if they hadn't won? Sure. It's only natural.

I love football, and I feel there are so many wonderful things young boys can learn from playing the sport. But, because you seem to have forgotten that our boys (who, I will remind you, are only 6 and 8) are here primarily to have a good time and to learn some of the basics of the game, I would like to remind you that there are no full-ride scholarships or championship trophies or Super Bowl rings on the line when we get together on Saturday mornings with other 6 and 8-year-olds from the surrounding area to toss around the pigskin. There are, however, quite a few slightly more important things that are on the line:

• Reputations--your reputation, your son's reputation, your team's reputation, and your hometown's reputation. Your actions do not just reflect poorly on you. Think about that.
• The opportunity to positively influence some very impressionable young men--Those boys look up to you. In addition to teaching them to play the game, you also have an opportunity to teach them integrity, sportsmanship, respect, good attitudes, and so much more. With so few people in the world worth looking up to, I would think you would want to try to be the kind of person who makes a positive difference in the lives of the children you have volunteered to work with.
• The love of the game--As I said, football is a great sport, but if 6 and 8 year olds feel it is life-and-death, they will cease to love it. It will become a burden for them, and many of them will not stick with it. Or, they may just get tired of incurring penalties on the field on your behalf and seek other forms of entertainment, where that will not be the case. 

If you are in need of a football coach to model, I would suggest Kevin Sumlin of Texas A&M. I have never once seen him rant or rave or throw things. He seems to remain in control of himself no matter what happens on the field and to focus on what he can change rather than what he can't. And, as it turns out, unlike you, he actually does have something pretty important on the line: his job.

Youth football has so much to offer, and I hope you will consider how your actions influence that--for better or worse. 

Sincerely, 

A concerned, football-loving mama