More Order and Progress

Last week I made a post listing some of my observations about Brazilian culture and ways of thinking. Here's the next installment:

• Less is definitely more when it comes to swim wear (for him and her) and maternity clothes—regardless of body size, shape or color.
• Granite is cheap and plentiful. In addition to all its regular uses, it is also used as baseboards, as toppers for cheap metal tables and to pave garages and sidewalks.
• It's not uncommon or unacceptable to refer to your wife as “My Woman.” Jeff was once invited to a BBQ party where the invitation specifically said, “It's okay to bring "The Woman.” I can't tell you how flattered I was.
• Why pay once when you can “passa la” (finance)? If you spend more than about $R 20 and you pay with your credit card, you are always asked if you'd like to divide the payment. It took a while for us to figure out the pricing when we first started coming to Brazil years ago because the prices are preceded by "Something X," showing how many payments of a certain amount are required to purchase the item. You can finance your tennis shoes, your groceries, or just whatever. The clerks are always shocked when Jeff and I opt to just pay the whole bill right then and there, with one swipe of the card.
• Burger King IS king. The line is ALWAYS long, and we never fail to see hordes of people, of all ages, taking pictures of themselves wearing the little paper crown. Clearly, these people aren't as creeped out by the Burger King character in the commercials as I am.
• A little bling is good. A lot is better.
• Everyone is born playing the guitar. Other instruments may be added at anytime.
• Passing zones mean nothing. Not even on twisty, turny mountain roads. Not even at 70 mph. Not even in pouring rain.
• Acceptable ways of answering the phone: “Pronto.” ("Ready.") and “Fala.” ("Speak.")
• There's no wrap like plastic wrap. In case the vacuum seal on the cheese isn't good enough for you, it is also wrapped in plastic wrap. So is luggage. I'm not kidding.
• You can easily fit 9 people in a compact car.
• They wouldn't have put a horn in the car if they didn't want you to use it.
• Cool is: listening to English music and wearing clothing with words printed in English. Even though you don't speak or understand a word. We've got this one covered. We've never been so cool!